Thursday, February 29, 2024

THE BEST THING!

By Ruth Plumly Thompson
Author of Ojo in Oz, "The Wizard of Pumperdink," "King, King! Double King!" etc.


Originally published in the Philadelphia Public Ledger, June 16, 1918.


Once upon a time a spider and a daddy longlegs got into a tremendous argument.

“I’m far superior to YOU,” said Daddy. “See what long legs I have, and how much faster I can RUN!”

“Flies and fiddlesticks,” grumbled the Spider. “What good is running. Can you SPIN?”

“Spin?” said Daddy Longlegs. “I wasn’t made for spinning! Can you run?”

“I don’t have time to run,” said the Spider. “I sit at home and spin, and let other folks do the running. SPINNING’S THE BEST!”

“RUNNING’S the BEST!” cried Daddy, shaking one of his legs angrily.

Just then a terrific gust of wind came sweeping around the corner of the porch. Daddy Longlegs saw it coming, and he did the thing that he thought was best—which was to run—and his long legs carried him safely to a hole between the boards of the porch.

And the spider—he saw the terrific gust of wind coming and he did the thing that he thought was best, which was to spin. Quick as a flash he spun a web round a splinter, then round and round him so that he was tied fast and the gust of wind did not carry him on.

When the terrific gust of wind had gone somewhere else Daddy Longlegs stepped out of his hole. “I’ll just see what became of that foolish spider who could not run,” said he. And the spider began untying his web and muttering to himself, “Now I wonder what became of that silly Daddy Longlegs who could not spin?”

“WHY, HELLO!” cried Daddy Longlegs in surprise when he came up to where the spider was untying himself. “WHY, HELLO! Thought you’d be blown atop the roof by this time!” “And I thought you’d be clear up to the clouds by now!” said the Spider to Daddy Longlegs.

“Well, you see now,” said Daddy, wagging his long leg triumphantly. “Running was the best.”

“I see nothing of the sort!” cried the spider, popping his eye. “Spinning was the best.” Then both of them stopped short, ’cause they both had discovered something.

“Why,” said Daddy, “I see how it is. Spinning’s the BEST for you, and running’s the BEST for me.”

“That’s it! That’s it!” cried the Spider. “Shake hands, Daddy Longlegs, shake hands!” And they did. So you see BOTH were best. That’s often the way with things.


Originally published in the Oakland Tribune, June 23, 1918

Supposyville Goes Sailing

Supposyville is not withal
A salt sea water nation,
They’ve never tried the uses of
The sea for recreation.
The King has lately read a lot
About the thrills of sailing,
Of skimming o’er the briny deep 
And ocean monsters trailing.

Therefore he calls Sir Solomon
And orders up a ship,
And bids the Queen and half the court
Make ready for the trip.
Sir Solomon looks very grave,
But says he’ll do his best.
“Quite so!” replied the King, “And I
Myself will do the rest!

“I’ve studied how to raise a sail
And climb the gallant mast,
To tack and bring her round and back
And run her slow and fast.”
Sir Solomon looked graver still,
But hied him off to start
A hundred workmen on the ship.
Complete in every part

Within a week she rode at ease
Beside the royal dock,
Complete from anchor to topsail,
From compass-deck to clock.
Sir Solomon he shook his head
When they invited him.
He said he was a bit too old
For such a lengthy swim.

“Swim!” laughed the King. “We’re going to sail.
What mean you anyway?”
“Nothing,” Solomon sighed. “Perhaps
You’ll understand some day.”
The King read from his book the duties
Of all hands aboard;
He took the wheel himself and now—
“Get under way!” he roared.

Some one forgot the anchor, but
At last they headed out
So swift and sudden that the King
Forgets what he’s about.
Round swept the boom and overboard
A dozen courtiers tumbled.
All hastily they’re rescued; not
A fellow of them grumbled.

Straight out and fast and faster still
They flew before the gale,
And desperately the courtiers clung
To cabin, chair and rail.
The motion, which they’d overlooked,
Began to take effect.
They mentioned turning homeward—Ho!
Aho! they little recked

That turning back’s a ticklish thing.
The King jammed down the rudder.
The boat turned on its side and soon
The waves began to flood her.
The sails ripped wide, the mast collapsed,
And tossed and thumped and battered,
The poor King and his courtiers in
The salty sea are scattered!

I’m mighty glad that they could swim,
I’m gladder still to say
That Solomon Tremendous Wise
Had started off straightway
They’d sailed and got a ship to save
Them, sirs, and in the nick
Of time it reached the spot and brought them
Home just double quick.

“I’ll have to see a doctor—not
So easy as it looks!”
The King groaned, all disconsolate;
“It sounds all right in books!”

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